Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice

Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice ★★★½

Full of dream sequences but like a dream generally: wrong, a messy pile of torn threads, broken as narrative but satisfying as an assemblage of confounding weird-ass sequences, sharp and fastidiously designed. Things just happen. Dour, and that weighs, but this is what you shepherded, nerds, what did you expect? How is this any worse that most of these idiotic movies from filmmakers who pretend to care about superhero comics (or worse, adults who actually do care about superhero comics)?

Dig the post-apocalypse vision, Batman in desert fatigues fighting Superman's army with his own army, lurching around shooting people with a handgun while Parademons swarm overhead; dig the gross bat-mutant Satan nightmare; dig Aquaman brooding in a sunken pirate ship, spearing the camera with his trident and then fucking off. Please, fill superhero movies with as many of these action figure-selling diversions as possible. And Ben Affleck CrossFit-aggro as hell, hitting a monster truck tire with a sledgehammer in the dark as his workout routine, c'mon.

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