Hook ★★

Day 14 of Month of Spielberg

Peter Pan left Neverland, completely forgot about it, and grew up. Then one day, his kids are kidnapped by Captain Hook and he has to go back to save them.

What the shit?

Dustin Hoffman and Robin Williams actually give some admiral performances, but they're surrounded by two and a half hours of slapstick gags that mostly involve Williams falling on his face and loads of sentimentality.

Julia Roberts was insufferably annoying.

The bits outside Neverland are super slow, and the bits inside Neverland are bloated and uninteresting.

I was going to give this one and a half stars, but I chuckled when Peter Pan used "near-sighted gynecologist" as an insult, so I'll give it an extra half star.

But hey, at least it's not War Horse.