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Fifty Shades of Grey 2015
The best one of the three.., and that's not saying anything.
Watched this with my then-girlfriend, and we had a great time...
...making jokes and laughing about this movie...
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Viceroy's House 2017
The movie sucked because there was no Bollywood dance scene during the credits...
....What do you mean it's a British film?.. It's about India, so it's a Bollywood film.. So what if it's produced by a British company..?
Cultural appropriation? It's about India! it would have been appropriate to have a dance scene about India!! It's the only reason people go see these types of films!
Jeez.., and people say I'm clueless...
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Fist Fight 2017
70 minutes of boring nothingness to get 20 minutes of cheap jokes and slapstick humor.
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Madly in Love 2013
Haha, vrouwen die vreemdgaan.
Haha, vrouwen die vreemdgaan met de partner van iemand uit de directe familie.
Haha, vrouwen die haar perfecte man laat wachten en tientallen mannen afgaat
Haha, vrouwen die denken dat t grappig is om met iemands gevoelens te spelen
Haha, godverdomme schijtfilm.
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Collateral Beauty 2016
This film puts M. Night Shyamalan to shame when it comes to plot twists.
My god, THIS FILM SUCKS. Why it is still at a 1.5* rating is beyond me, but if I had to guess it would probably be the acting skills of these experienced actors, and the endless editing and color grading that they did in post.
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Nine Lives 2016
A lot better than I expected based on reviews I've heard, but it looks/sounds like a fucking TV-movie. How did this get a wide release?
Whatever, Kevin Spacey as a cat is still fun.
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American Pastoral 2016
''I'm guessing it's a four.
In ladies', that's as small as they come.
Stick it in.''''[moans]
Taste it.
Taste it and you'll know.
Do you want to know
how it tastes?
[imitates stuttering]
It t-tastes like y-your d-d-daughter.'' -