Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey

Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey ½

You have to be a special kind of lazy to pull this off, this shit manages to stink worse than all those Epic / Disaster / Date Movie parodies we got in the the late 2000s. And those were a spat in the face to anyone that gave those inbred directors their money to keep them in the cinema releases 😭

Godawful. At least Winnie the Pooh’s design looks somewhat realistic, when he isn’t looking absolutely stoned out of his mind. Piglet just looks ass. The whole movie feels like they gave the writers some 30 XR adderall, locked them in a group study room for 10 hours, and the best they came up with was a bunch of plot point dots that they proceeded to connect together with a crimson red highlighter. And voila, you end up with an arbitrarily existing product in the film vacuum, simply because of a public domain expiration. 😕

I just don’t get it. You could write up whatever you want with these characters into a horror version, you grabbed the rights to do so for a reason. And yet they do nothing with it. Less than nothing. Not a shred of creativity, passion, sense of identity or real interest in this thing. Shoutout the actresses, they are not at fault for trying to get their name out there with one of the worst scripts possible. They do what they can, but this has to be one of the cheapest rubbish that’s been released in quite a while. Even that Jeepers Creepers Reborn had SOMETHING going for it. 😣

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