"What more could I lose?"

That's it, I'm done, I swear. Seriously, I have no further plans, I've ran out of people to see it with and I'm going on holiday. I didn't cry as much today, I think I'm all out. Part of me wishes yesterday had been the last time. Obviously, that's not on the movie - although it is emotionally draining. I need distance from it but I didn't enjoy it any less.

Today, I just wanted to praise performances. In particular, the holy trinity of Chrises. I think Chris Pratt might be my favourite in this movie. It's like he upped his game to stand out amongst the sea of talent. He has perfect comedic timing and can really turn in the dramatic beats. His chemistry with Zoe Saldana rises above the will-they-won't-they banter of the Guardians' movies and competed with Paul Bettany and Elizabeth Olsen for which romantic couple would make me cry more. In fact, all four of these actors managed to sell relationships that were only implied and tertiary to other ensemble movies in the biggest one possible. Or maybe I'm just a sucker for romance and tragedy?

Anyway, I realised out of the two Peters I relate slightly more to Quill than Parker. Partially due to the fact I'm no longer a teenager like Parker. Like myself, both make cultural references to older movies and music but I see myself in Quill's use of humour as a self-defence mechanism. Basically, I'm a man child with problems.

Who know who else uses humour to pretend he's okay despite overwhelming trauma? Thor. The more I watch it, the scene where he talks to Rocket about losing everything, Chris Hemsworth breaks my heart. Since Ragnarok allowed him to have fun with the character and I rewatched everything, his character has quickly become one of my favouriteS. In a way, it's a riches to rags tale, the fish out of water yet the strongest Avenger who comes to the rescue despite everything he's been through. Will he survive Avengers 4? I have no idea, I kind of hope not.

Speaking of characters I never expected to care about: Loki, Tony Stark and Doctor Strange. Particularly that last one, I didn't care about his solo movie at all but admittedly, his magic hand gestures and take-downs of Stark were pretty cool. By the way, nobody knows Tony Stark better than Robert Downey Jr, he's perfected that role to the point where I wouldn't be surprised if they let him write his own lines. That back-and-forth between him and Pepper, the quick way they talked, has been a constant for 10 years!

Finally, I don't think Chris Evans is getting enough credit for his toned-down, quiet Steve Rogers. The weary sadness behind his eyes. Again, another Avenger whose been through so much and yet feels like he has a duty to fight another day. When he defies Secretary Ross or orders the others to protect Vision, that's when he's Captain America. The same bravery shown by that skinny lad from Brooklyn climaxes when he literally stands up to the biggest bully in the universe. Ignoring his super-strength, it shows how anyone can be a hero and how far his character has come from humble beginnings.

Recently I've not been feeling great, maybe not to the same degree as Cap or Thor or even Star Lord but pretty low. And I realised how thankful I was for the escape provided by this universe. No matter how bad things get, at least I know they can't be worse than Thanos and the MCU will make me feel better, as I'm sure it does for so many others.

So, thank you Kevin Feige and all the cast and crew who've ever been involved in the Marvel Cinematic Universe. Here's to 10 more years!