• Death Race 2000

    Death Race 2000

    ★★★★½

    A B-eautiful kill! A NEAT kill!

    Pretty much a perfect exploitation movie. Took the trendy format of stuff like Cannonball Run, Gumball Rally & (my favorite anime) Wacky Races, spiced it up with laid-back ultraviolence, gratuitous nudity & satire that’s likely even more on-target in 2022. Hospital staffers routinely wheel out old folk to dispose of them while providing President’s guy some easy points, the TV hosts live up to names like “Grace Pander”, sports celebs manufacture controversy by running down Deacons…

  • oDubbbz

    oDubbbz

    ★★★★

    A warm tribute to a kind of relationship I feel like lots of us have stuffed way in the back of a mental drawer: the ill-advised crush turned briefly, oddly, achingly mutual, transmuted not into a romantic relationship but into an ambiguous, charged entanglement.

    IMO, the best documentary about an unreleased documentary to be released (so far) in 2022.

  • Girl, Interrupted

    Girl, Interrupted

    ★★½

    Have you ever confused a dream with life? Or stolen something when you have the cash?

  • Kickboxer

    Kickboxer

    ★★★½

    Impetuous shitstarter Yuen Biao challenges corrupt officials, triads & British bullies, woos a newspaper reporter (some good printing press content), plays human chess for a pair of solid gold shoes, gets kicked out of Wong Fei-hung’s clinic after being framed for opium trafficking & pukes on a ninja. He also directs the action, so you know it’s sick.

    Attractive sets & locations, Jan Hammer-type score, dynamic camerawork, nice editing rhythms & a touch of successful (usually herbal tea-related) slapstick.

    Not sure if this counts as a SPOILER, but if you liked the end of Scarface you might enjoy this one.

  • Magic

    Magic

    ★★★

    Anthony Hopkins is very good in this but it could be even better remade with Jeff Dunham

    William Goldman is a great screenwriter because he understands that women are attracted to creepy & raunchy puppets

  • Mr. Arkadin

    Mr. Arkadin

    ★★★★

    Orson Welles grew a cool beard



    or did he?

  • Spoiler

    Spoiler

    ★★★½

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    In the future, good dad Gary Daniels serves a 1-year sentence (for about 80 years) on a prison planet. That’s because the punishment for escapees, or “spoilers”, is to be cryogenically frozen for 35 years each time, and he just can’t overcome the masculine urge to bust out & see his daughter.

    Essentially one foiled escape attempt after another, with plenty of fun little sci-fi details, snappy dialogue & an all-star roster (Meg Foster! Bruce Glover! Tony Cox! The mayor from RoboCop…

  • Bums

    Bums

    ★★½

    MSG Shooter McGavin tracks down his derelict brother, who is then immediately slashed by a prolific Skid Row Killer. Since the cops won’t handle it, he recruits a squad of the most capable, gold-hearted local hobos & molds them into a fighting force using Salvation Army guerilla tactics. A real dirty dozen, if you will. They also instruct him in the ways of the bum. Meanwhile, he starts dating a detective & the motives behind the killings start to unravel.

    Not much…

  • Double Team

    Double Team

    ★★★½

    Gonna start telling dates I was the baby in Double Team & Dennis Rodman is my godfather

    I would definitely hire the superkicker henchman who packs a switchblade between his toes. That shows real dedication & outside-the-box thinking.

  • Kingdom of the Spiders

    Kingdom of the Spiders

    ★★★★

    Happy New Year everyone, here’s to another ons

  • New Year's Evil

    New Year's Evil

    ★★★★

    “LISTEN to the REPLAY.”

    My only resolution is to watch this again on 12/31/22.

  • Instant Kung Fu Man

    Instant Kung Fu Man

    ★★★

    Fei Yang Yeh is a shaolin student who pisses his pants & can only rely on his wits (and literal tricks up his sleeve), so he cheats to get out of the temple. His twin brother is a notorious kung fu bandit who, early on, double-crosses his partner (Hwang Jang-Lee). The goofy twin passes himself off as his brother, takes on the phenomenal Simon Yuen (In the Line of Duty IV) as his “disciple” (getting him to fight all his battles) & becomes…