Spider-Man: No Way Home

Spider-Man: No Way Home ★★★

Three Spidermen (plural to Spiderman?) walk into a bar. The bartender asks what they want to drink. Simultaneously, they all say, 'with great power comes great responsibility,' and then they all start crying hysterically at the same time. The bartender points to a sign hanging in the bar that says No Crying in Baseball and then pours them all a whiskey sour and tells them to cheer up or get out.

That pretty much happened in Spider-Man: No Way Teenagers Are Actually This Stupid, but without the bar and lots more crying and web-slinging hijinks. Yes, the nostalgic circle jerk was entertaining, and I did shoot webs, but the hype train for this was way too high for what this turned out to be.

I love that this movie's actual point to reform the baddies from every previous Sony Spiderman was utterly pointless. Spoiler alert here: If you send back reformed criminals to their multiverse planet where they've killed hundreds or thousands of people, they might not die, but they will rot in prison and probably be put to death on the taxpayer's dollar. Good job, Spidey. More crap I have to pay for now.

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