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Pitch Perfect 2012
If The Cup Song was released today it would do unprecedented numbers on TikTok, top the Billboard Hot 100 for 13 consecutive weeks and get a remix with features from Megan Thee Stallion and Saweetie.
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Unpregnant 2020
At one point the protagonist sees a graffiti heart on the wall, whips out her phone, and immediately posts it to Instagram with the caption 'vibes ✨❤️✨'. Film never fully recovers, but there are some nice moments along the road.
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Léon: The Professional 1994
For my money, the most overrated movie of the 90s. Natalie Portman puts in an impressively mature performance, but the film itself feels like a pastiche of better works and the relationship between Léon and Mathilda is neither believable nor particularly moving.
Most of the low/middling reviews here seem to be related to the ‘romance’ aspect, which, while obviously questionable, is hardly the focal point of the film. To pretend it is feels disingenuous imo. My problem with Léon is…
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The Fallout 2021
I can't watch another movie about trauma that ends in a scream therapy session I just can't.
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I Want You Back 2022
My main takeaway from this is that Jenny Slate would make a great sixth member of the Always Sunny gang.
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The Tinder Swindler 2022
I'm invincible to this man because I have no money and I also don't know how to take out a loan.
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Spider-Man: No Way Home 2021
No Way Home is neither the masterpiece delusional Marvel fans think it is nor the death of cinema others are making it out to be. It's just fine, which makes its curve all the more outrageous.
I think what's happening here is that Marvel nerds – drunk on nostalgia and sick of being told that their favourite movies suck – are giddy at the prospect of the MCU cracking the upper echelons of film criticism for once. On the other…
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Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings 2021
Does a pretty good impression of 80s and 90s Kung Fu movies for about the first hour – including two excellent fight scenes (bus chase and scaffolding escape) – but ultimately falls into the same trap as every other Marvel movie by the third act... the sloppy, mindless CGI battle.
This one has a particularly egregious example, featuring a greatest hits of Marvel's worst tendencies: 1) unconvincing CGI landscapes, 2) CGI objects being blasted back and forth, 3) generic CGI monsters pouring out of generic CGI hole. It's an unfortunate reminder that Marvel movies are still exactly that: Marvel movies.