• Gone Girl

    Gone Girl

    I don't know why people keep saying Amy is a villain she didn't do anything wrong

  • Bringing Up Baby

    Bringing Up Baby

    ★★½

    Cary Grant is way too ugly to be so rude to every woman in every movie ever

  • Climax

    Climax

    If you like this movie I don't like you. If you like this movie you probably think you're better than everyone else and spend 3/4 of your life just judging other people for everything they do.

  • Avengers: Endgame

    Avengers: Endgame

    I literally just want to die

  • Bubble Boy

    Bubble Boy

    Another cinematic masterpiece, although it does not quite reach the heights of Hannah Montana: The Movie it is a valiant effort and falls in at a close second. This film is the definition of an epic journey. Since the release of this film, Homer has only appeared again in public once, caught by the paparazzi cowering in shame. He knew the moment this film graced our theatres that Bubble Boy had just stolen the crown that The Odyssey once held…

  • Bubble Boy

    Bubble Boy

    Another cinematic masterpiece, although it does not quite reach the heights of Hannah Montana: The Movie it is a valiant effort and falls in at a close second. This film is the definition of an epic journey. Since the release of this film, Homer has only appeared again in public once, caught by the paparazzi cowering in shame. He knew the moment this film graced our theatres that Bubble Boy had just stolen the crown that The Odyssey once held…

  • Fight Club

    Fight Club

    I liked Brad Pitt's outfits but there were just so many men on the screen all at once all being ugly and aggressive so I had to take like ten breaks and watch H2o to get through to the end of it. I get that there are movies about toxic masculinity and you aren't supposed to like the characters whatever I just don't know why I have to see it happening. I have to look at men being toxic every…

  • Donnie Darko

    Donnie Darko

    This was one of the mopiest movies I've ever seen in my life. Not to be a bitch, but I am a Professional Bitch so I will do what I must. I'm pretty sure I accidentally watched the director's cut so I'm sure that didn't help but this movie seemed like it was written by a 15-year-old boy who just discovered sadness and watched a few episodes of doctor who. Nobody can sit here and tell me I didn't like it because I didn't get it, I get it. I just literally do not care about any this whiny little bitches problems

  • Hannah Montana: The Movie

    Hannah Montana: The Movie

    A cinematic masterpiece, I am still and have always been outraged that this movie did not win best picture at the Oscars. I had assumed that it at the VERY LEAST had won best actress, incredible talent Miley Cyrus played two characters with the skill of Meryl Streep. This has not been done so well since the work of art that is "The Parent Trap". The cinematography in this film was absolutely breathtaking, trying to describe the beauty of these…

  • Call Me by Your Name

    Call Me by Your Name

    I don't know why I watched a cannibal groom Timothee Chalamet but Italy is pretty I guess

  • Brokeback Mountain

    Brokeback Mountain

    Jake Gyllenhaal deserved lube in the tent poor man was washing blood out of his boxers in the river the next morning.

  • Jojo Rabbit

    Jojo Rabbit

    Taika Waititi owns me. He could make a movie about the story of his used q-tip going into the garbage and then into the landfill to sit there for a billion years decomposing and I would cry, give it five stars, and hang the poster on my wall for the rest of my life.