Meatcleaver Massacre

Meatcleaver Massacre ★★½

There are no meat cleavers in this movie. There is a straight razor featured at one point that I thought would graduate to an actual meat cleaver, but then it didn't happen. But then wait, the title is Meatclever Massacre. Maybe this one word spelling of 'meat cleaver' means something totally different. Maybe 'meatcleaver' is code for an instructor of an occult history class taking revenge on the four students who, while wearing pantyhose on their heads, murder his whole family and leave him debilitated and near death. In an immobilized state the instructor conjures an ancient, otherworldly demon to pick the killer students off one by one in increasingly gruesome ways, as illustrated in a scary looking painting hanging on a wall somewhere. Here 'Meatcleaver' means this scenario, obviously.

The credits for this on Tubi list Christopher Lee. but he was as elusive as the actual meat cleaver. And really, it would be very sad if he really had anything to do with this movie. There are scenes shot in a dreamy haze when there is no dream to be had. The killers look too old and too unambitious to be in college. They appear more like 1970s stoners in jean jackets and puffy, curly, parted in the middle hairdos. This is one of those SOV films that ended up on video store shelves rented in giant, plastic boxes in the '90s, I imagine.

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