• The French Dispatch

    The French Dispatch

    wes anderson’s version of a mel brooks’ movie

  • Dune


    really glad that Denis Villeneuve understands that:
    -the best part of sci-fi movies is watching big weird ships take-off & land extremely slowly

    -the most important part of sci-fi movies is watching cool weird people slowly exit those big weird ships

  • Halloween Kills

    Halloween Kills

    extremely funny how this movie explicitly reminds you that michael myers really only killed three people on halloween night in the 1978 original, before having him genocide the entire town of haddonfield in this one

  • Jungleland


    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    turned into the leo pointing meme when nick mullen appeared onscreen

  • Venom: Let There Be Carnage

    Venom: Let There Be Carnage

    saw this yesterday because I had two hours to kill. I understand why people like this but it’s just not for me. in fact I spent the majority of the runtime trying to figure out what I even want from a movie anymore because this is not it. only part of the movie that kept my attention was the brief scene where michelle williams uses a fake sexy voice on venom/mrs. chen, that was good

  • The Many Saints of Newark

    The Many Saints of Newark

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    absolutely fucking lost it when this pulled the beerfest identical twin brother gag

  • The Matrix Revolutions

    The Matrix Revolutions

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    it’s possible I only feel this way because I just watched the entire series in a 24 hour period, but i’m pretty sure that trinity & neo flying above the machines, the smoke, the lightening & the darkness to see the clear, blue sky for one brief, glorious moment is one of the most transcendent moments in movies

  • The Matrix Reloaded

    The Matrix Reloaded

    will never forgive the mtv movie awards & will farrell for making me think the scene with the architect didn’t rule for a period of years. now that we are far enough away from all the endless parodies, cultural riffs & homages, everything in this once again works beautifully to me

  • The Matrix

    The Matrix

    walking into a 7/11 at 6am dressed as morpheus and telling the cashier “things are about to get a little weird”

    honestly pretty sure that the entire cinematic medium was created purely to facilitate the lobby shootout

  • The Animatrix

    The Animatrix

    matrix resurrections trailer is so good that it has me rewatching the animatrix for the first time since 2004

    also the second renaissance parts 1 & 2 might be one of the most upsetting pieces of sci-fi ever made

  • Cruella


    this would’ve been better if it ended with mark strong shooting someone with a sniper rifle as revenge for betraying him in budapest

  • The Departed

    The Departed

    was about to go to bed after watching the season finale of hard knocks when I saw this was playing on tv so I watched up until a commercial break. still can’t believe baldwin didn’t win an oscar for his speech about marriage. also, a junkie waking up to the vision of the virgin mary only to have it immediately smashed over his head might be the purest distillation of martin scorsese’s very essence