Max Oxley’s review published on Letterboxd:
- I don't know why I'm doing this to myself
- Why is Russell Crowe here, am I accidentally watching Noah? I sure hope so
- As it turns out, I am not accidentally watching Noah
- They've made Michael Shannon look even more like a bug/lizard/man hybrid than ever and I fully support this creative decision
- The main problem I have with superhero movies is that the heroes don't get called "dicksplash" enough, thanks Zack Snyder for putting that right
- Now Amy Adams is talking about measuring dicks, I think Zack Snyder just really likes dicks
- What grown woman says she needs to "tinkle" this movie was legitimately written by a four year old
- This is kinda like the first X-men movie but without any of the humanity or humour or sideburns
- Why isn't Clark Kent a massive nerd, that's literally the only good thing about superman
- I have literally zero feelings about Henry Cavill other than I'm pretty sure he's not a real human and is just an impressive CG creation.
- Ok so now the 'S' symbol on Supey's chest isn't even an S, what
- I never see anyone criticise the special effects in this movie, but a lot of it looks super dumb
- I totally tuned out for like the entire last hour of this so god knows what was happening but there were lots of explosions so gg Zack, you know what the people want
- Honestly there isn't much notably awful stuff here, it's just really boring and I couldn't find anything to like other than Shannon to an extent. I bet Zack Snyder has tried to suck his own dick on multiple occasions.