lauren Patron

Favorite films

  • Lady Bird
  • Twilight
  • Carol
  • Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl

Recent activity

  • Love Actually


  • Napoleon


  • The Boy and the Heron


  • Family Switch


Pinned reviews

  • Little Women

    Little Women


    I held open the door for Greta Gerwig on her way into the Q&A, and she treated me like a fully inanimate object. She is a laser focused boss woman. I am a wooden door stop. 

    And all I have to say is.


  • The Twilight Saga: Eclipse

    The Twilight Saga: Eclipse


    Kristen Stewart trying to hop on Robert Pattinson’s dick is a lesbian act

Recent reviews

  • Love Actually

    Love Actually


    why don’t more christmas movies feature keira knightley fan cams???

  • Napoleon



    damn imagine getting cucked so bad you start a war you can’t finish over the supernational state

    also, the use of “dawn” from pride and prejudice in this puppy absolutely boggles the mind…….

Popular reviews

  • The Prince & Me

    The Prince & Me


    princess diaries but make it fast & furious

  • Win a Date with Tad Hamilton!

    Win a Date with Tad Hamilton!


    Where was Octavia Spencer’s best supporting actress nomination for her work as Cashier at Piggly Wiggly?