Kazmer has written 67 reviews for films rated ★★★★★ .

  • Despiser



    God this movie fucking rules. Every scene has so many amazing details, so many incredible decisions being made every moment, I've never seen a more engaging film. This is the definition of morbid fascination. It's like someone took every graphics card box art from 2003 and made a whole movie about their lore.

    I love Despiser. It's my favorite movie. I give it 5 bags of popcorn and 2 bags of soda.

  • Boys State

    Boys State


    I'm way too stupid and uninformed to make an intelligent observation on what is actually happening in this doc and in America today. What I can say is holy shit why is the cinematography and editing in this so good??? This looks better than most studio narrative films do where they can do as many takes as they want. Goddamn.

  • The House That Jack Built

    The House That Jack Built


    This is at least my 5th time watching this and I think I've just about run out of things to say. It's perfect. The filmmaking, the dialogue, the comedy, the violence...in nearly every detail, it's flawless.

    Through every sensible metric of modern morality standards, nothing about this film should work or even be tolerable, yet Von Trier fights through a hurricane of counter-points to his philosophy to construct not only a morbidly fascinating story, but a gripping essay on how…

  • Anguish



    A mind-warping fever dream of a film. Contains one of the most genuinely frightening sequences I've ever seen. Supremely uncomfortable and constantly evolving. Shocked that this isn't more iconic. Put Anguish on the Criterion Collection immediately.

  • Killer Klowns from Outer Space

    Killer Klowns from Outer Space


    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    The happy ending of this film is a large portion of the town's population dying in a massive explosion.

  • Gremlins 2: The New Batch

    Gremlins 2: The New Batch


    Automatic 5 stars to any movie with a Marathon Man dentist reference

  • An Evening with Tim Heidecker

    An Evening with Tim Heidecker


    The amazing thing about this special is literally all of the jokes are intentionally and aggressively unfunny, right down to how the poster is designed, and yet it's one of the greatest sets I've ever seen. I cannot imagine how agonizing it would be watching this with someone who doesn't understand the context of Heidecker being the most irony drenched man on the planet.

  • The Return of the Living Dead

    The Return of the Living Dead


    "This bad boy can fit so much melting zombie gas"

    Bangs fist on container

  • Tokyo Gore Police

    Tokyo Gore Police


    Put the pissing chair prop in the Smithsonian

  • Green Room

    Green Room


    Frightening. Nauseating. Every negative emotion in the human psyche, pulled out and obliterated. Every moment of this film feels disgusting to be part of. The brutality, the hatred, the overwhelming sense of death. An existential overload of a movie. I hate every second of watching this and it might be my actual 30th viewing by this point.

  • I'm Thinking of Ending Things

    I'm Thinking of Ending Things


    "I guess that's what one hopes for when writing a poem...some universality in the specific..."

    Every moment of this film is absolutely agonizing to sit through. I cannot formulate a single argument in its favor. Its appeal is inarticulable.

    It's perfect.

  • Gremlins 2: The New Batch

    Gremlins 2: The New Batch


    I unironically think this movie blows the first film out of the water. Blatantly psychotic and proud of it. The level of production value dedicated to this cacophany of madness is jaw dropping. A fever dream of disgusting lunacy. Holy shit.