Gremlins ★★★★

As yuletide approaches; again in the mood
To muse on a classic with rhyming imbued.
Topical chatter of tricks from the Kremlin,
Led me to pine for a re-watch of Gremlins

A walk through the backstreets of old Chinatown
Leads us to a shop umpteen steps underground
Dad Randall Pentzer; an inventor by trade
In search of a gift, or a way to get paid

In a small gallery of all things unique
He promotes bathroom buddy; groomer for geeks
Then Pentzer spies the perfect gift for his son
An adorable creature; of which there is one

The old shopkeeper refuses the vending;
Its’ great responsibility; un-ending
But shopkeeper’s grandson strikes a secret deal
Good intentions, but understanding puerile.

Meanwhile Randalls’s son Billy’s Bug just won’t start
Damn foreign cars! Mr Futterman’s imparts
Billy and dog Barney take traverse afoot
Trying to avoid his new bank job kaput

Evil Mrs. Deagle bursts into the bank
With demeanour of Scrooge; her soul is most dank
A broken glass snowman; she’s come to avenge
Caused by Billy’s dog Barney; she wants revenge

Randall returns home with the quarry in tow
Anxious to son Billy the gift to bestow
Billy, overjoyed, heeds the three rules conveyed
Brings Gizmo to his loft; a bedroom with shade

Promises made are not easily heeded
Spill of a glass leads to furballs; unneeded
New mischievous brood has a clock in its sight
There’s going to be after hours dining some night

Drunk Mr. Futterman laments the old days
American machines; built in proper ways
That’s no longer so with today’s foreign jobs
They admix Gremlins with the gears and the cogs

Our Billy walks home the cute bartender Kate
With goal in mind of asking her on a date
He discovers enroute; her soul is quite sick
She doesn’t relish the return of Saint Nick.

Now back at home Billy retires for the night
The new brood are hungry; riot for a bite
A check of the clock, it’s ok to bestow
They ravenous devour; all but Gizmo

Now in the morning; Billy he’s off to work
Transformation complete; in dark they do lurk
Mom is home alone, and finds to her surprise
A house filled with hellions, although just pint sized

Mom battles brood bravely; knife as defender
Dispatches by stab, microwave, and blender
Billy arrives as the battle is turning
But lead Gremlin Stripe dashes; red eyes burning

Stripes dip in a pool replenishes the clutch
And now this new gang invades Kate’s barroom hutch
Anarchic Gremlins Porky’s tavern do trash
But quick thinking Kate drives them out with a flash

Now to the cinema, the Gremlins do move
To gobble confections; Snow White interlude
But Billy and Kate have a plan; a checkmate
While singing ‘Hi Ho’ the pair incinerate

Wiley Stripe, once more, escapes just but by chance
Down the street a department store his glance
Cat and mouse matches; like climbing a mountain
For goodness sake don’t let Stripe find that fountain!

I don’t want to spoil the outcome, per-se
Could google it easily any old day
A warning I give as you open your socks
Keep watch on your servers, N.B., Letterboxd.

Merry Christmas!

Jonathan liked these reviews

All