Jacob has written 26 reviews for films during 2021.

  • Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings

    Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings

    ★★★

    Finally an Avenger with Daddy Issues for the rest of us! 

    Some of the best visuals and the absolute best fight scenes, wrapped up in some of the weakest plot points and some of the worst jokes. There is no reason to include *that* character in anything again, let alone in this.

  • The Night House

    The Night House

    ★★★★½

    Many apologies to anyone in the theater with me during *that* jump scare where I shouted “Jesus CHRIST”, I truly disassociated out of pure fear.

    Rebecca Hall has no problem letting you know early and often that she is *not* doing alright. Beautiful, horrible, excellent.

  • Candyman

    Candyman

    ★★★★

    The number of shots of that man touching his bee sting should be illegal, it made me want to crawl out of my own skin. 

    Excellent from start to finish. The score and cinematography stand out in particular to create a bone chilling and tense atmosphere.

  • Free Guy

    Free Guy

    ★★★

    Sadly we have found a scenario where Taika Waititi isn’t all that funny. 

    Like if The Truman Show and The Lego Movie had a worse, slightly over the top but still somehow a pretty good time baby.

  • Zola

    Zola

    ★★★★½

    Every time this movie goes off the rails and I think it cannot possibly go more off the rails, it finds more rails and immediately goes off of those rails.

  • Nine Days

    Nine Days

    ★★★★★

    A movie that is relentlessly earnest in its romanticism and love of life. Winston Duke delivers a true achievement that should have him as an Oscar contender.

  • Annette

    Annette

    ★★

    I don’t believe in prison but the makers of those damned puppets are testing me.

  • The Green Knight

    The Green Knight

    ★★★★★

    David Lowery doesn’t care if you’re buckled in, he’s got Dev Patel all hot and sweaty and you’re going on this ride whether you’re ready or not. 

    A marvel from start to finish.

  • The Suicide Squad

    The Suicide Squad

    ★★★★

    All King Shark wants is friends and nom nom and I relate to that on a deep, spiritual level.

  • Old

    Old

    ½

    All thoughts left my head the moment they introduced the character “Mid Sized Sedan”

    The level of unhinged this movie is has broken my brain for all time.

  • Pig

    Pig

    ★★★★½

    Give that Pig an Oscar right. now.


    (Give the Pig’s understudy one, too)

  • Black Widow

    Black Widow

    ★★★

    This exact same movie but everyone except Florence Pugh is a muppet. Because why bother trying to act next to her