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“Oh, no, he's going to sing”

I hope Cinderella destroys careers. A perfect and plain example of why modern Hollywood is on a trajectory to destroy itself. Every single aspect about this feature is derivative of what has become before. Corden and Cannon have seemingly seen the genius of Baz Luhrmann’s Romeo + Juliet and in their sheer ignorance and ego felt that their skill could not be matched. The production and set design are atrociously cheap. Performances (Porter aside) are comatose and void of charisma in every single molecule with Cinderella incorporating everyone and anyone who has had a “moment” in order to capitalise breadcrumbs of possible success. The soundtrack is cringeworthy to a point it might redefine certain beloved songs into oblivion for this generation. In a world in which Lynne Ramsay, Martin Scorsese, Michael Mann and David Lynch are unable to get funding for projects and this exists, the times for cinematic prosperity are seemingly over.


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