Grant Hodges has written 29 reviews for films rated .

  • Cars 2

    Cars 2

    A movie so bad it took me three separate viewings to get through the whole thing...

    Okay, perhaps that's unfair. Cars 2 isn't the worst movie ever made (though it is the worst movie Pixar's made thus far). It's just relentlessly mediocre. It doubles down on the childish humor of the first while adding onto it some equally childish dialogue and characterization. And why is it a spy movie? If Pixar wanted to make a spy movie, they could've just…

  • Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker

    Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker

    I think it’s actually admirable how quickly The Rise of Skywalker starts sucking. A lot of bad movies will get your hopes up with an interesting first half or something... but not The Rise of Skywalker. No, it’s abundantly clear this thing is shit about seven seconds in - when it’s revealed, in the first fucking sentence of the opening crawl, that Palpatine is back from the dead. It’s a bafflingly stupid decision clearly made by a creative team that…

  • The New Mutants

    The New Mutants

    Holy shit, this movie sucks. No. You know what? You can't even call this a movie. The New Mutants is a bottle episode of a show you've never seen before... and never will again cause it was canceled after the single episode. I mean there are like six people and one set in the entire thing! Aside from the overuse of VFX (most of which don't even look that good), it's absolutely mind-boggling that this movie cost 80 million dollars.…

  • Garfield: A Tail of Two Kitties

    Garfield: A Tail of Two Kitties

    It's obviously terrible. But idk the animation has improved, a couple jokes did get a laugh out of me, and it's paced quick enough that you can watch it without wanting to kill yourself. And that's more than can be said of the original...

    1 Star

  • Geostorm

    Geostorm

    I would say that Geostorm is baffling in its stupidity, but then again - with a title like that - was anyone expecting greatness? The script feels like it was written by a middle schooler, one that had absolutely no grasp on how weather or technology worked. I mean there’s literally a scene where Gerard’s Butler character has filmed a secret message, and when the other characters figure this out, they quickly input a bunch of shit into a computer…

  • Tom & Jerry

    Tom & Jerry

    Look, I know this movie isn't for me. And that's perfectly fine. But even as a children's movie, it's pretty mediocre.

    From the terrible sound design to the lackluster animation, from the bland cinematography to the more-than-questionable hip-hop soundtrack, it's kind of difficult to even pinpoint the film's biggest flaw. But if I had to identify one, it would be that the titular characters, Tom & Jerry, are barely even in it. Instead, the focus is put almost entirely on Chloe…

  • Justice League

    Justice League

    The worst movie... ever?

    That's not really hyperbole, either. I mean there are certainly worse movies. But in terms of budget versus what actually ended up on the screen, this thing is terrible. That being said... I find it fucking hilarious to watch.

    Call it morbid curiosity but I just get such joy out of seeing this barely cobbled-together studio nightmare. Cause that's what it is. Not a Snyder or Whedon film (though their highly conflicting tones do clash beautifully),…

  • The Creation Adventure Team: Six Short Days, One Big Adventure

    The Creation Adventure Team: Six Short Days, One Big Adventure

    A hilariously inaccurate “educational” video explaining how evolution is wrong and creationism is good. Feels like the kind of straight-up propaganda I was shown in Christian school. But watching it under the influence with one of your friends from that school? IDEAL.

  • A Recipe for Seduction

    A Recipe for Seduction

    Ridiculous... but almost worth watching for how it fits every single Lifetime movie cliche into the span of about fifteen minutes.

    1 Star

  • Locked Down

    Locked Down

    Hathaway and Ejiofor may be trying their best, but even their lack of chemistry can't save this misfire of a movie. It's visually repulsive - shot either handheld or (in far worse cases) over zoom. The script - from beginning to end - consists entirely of exposition. And the majority of the cast simply facetimed in... and I'm sure got paid a ridiculous amount for it. Even looking at this purely as a relationship drama or heist film, it fails…

  • 300

    300

    I'm starting to really not understand the cult-like following that Zack Snyder has garnered for himself. Cause after revisiting his first two films, I gotta say I really don't like him. Technically, 300 may be considered impressive by some - there are some highly stylized action sequences and a distinct visual style present. But personally, I find the look of this film to be horribly unattractive - the fact that almost all of it was filmed on a sound stage…

  • Dawn of the Dead

    Dawn of the Dead

    And you thought I hated the original...

    I will never understand the love for Zack Snyder’s Dawn of the Dead. That’s not to say you can’t love it, of course. You can enjoy whatever you like. But personally, I find this movie to be so bland in every area - so lacking in terms of script and direction - that it feels like I may as well be watching static instead.

    The thing doesn’t even start that bad. It moves…