Blonde ★½

Twin Peaks: Fire Walk With Me does not deserve to have its name stained by being compared to this.

Despite the impressive crafts on display and the admittedly daring performance from de Armas (who really does care about this project and doing justice to Marilyn Monroe), this is a truly insufferable experience. I can appreciate a certain degree of self-indulgence, but this film is obnoxiously self-indulgent. So much of this film's directing feels like Dominik is just sitting behind the camera jerking off to the point that the film feels like a porno. Yes many of the technical elements are extremely well done, but to paraphrase Chris Stuckmann, you can get a good DP to light a porno really well and shoot it from and interesting angle but it's still a porno. If it were limited to one or two or three sex/nude scenes, that'd be one thing because sometimes seeing sex is necessary and like who has sex with their clothes on, but the sex and nudity is excessive and it really feels like there's no purpose to it other than for the director to get off to it. And the film tries to have commentary on how Hollywood exploited and mistreated Marilyn Monroe, which they definitely did do that but don't you think including all these sex scenes and titty shots with her is you basically doing the same thing? The film's commentary is really hollow even though it tries to be deep. It's one of the most pretentious things I've ever seen tbh. Also the CGI fetus scene was worse than I imagined it holy shit 💀💀💀💀💀

Anyway how much y'all wanna bet this is Andrew Tate's favorite movie?

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