Cinderella

Cinderella ★★

Quickie Review
Congratulations, He's All That. You are no longer the cringiest cringe fest to hit streaming during these final days of summer. You're still 2nd place but you're not the top one anymore so call it a win. Anyway, this latest cinematic iteration of the classic Charles Perrault fairy tale (apparently there's 35 film versions of Perrault's Cinderella) gets the jukebox musical treatment with this Prime Video original movie produced by Sony Pictures and written & directed by Kay Cannon, writer of the Pitch Perfect trilogy and writer/director of Blockers. Pop superstar Camila Cabello makes her feature acting debut as the latest version of Cinderella or Ella who, in this version, dreams of being a world famous fashion designer despite her stepmother (Idina Menzel) and stepsisters' (Maddie Baillio & Charlotte Spencer) attempts to get in her way and society dictating how things work but her dreams are bigger than the world will allow so with the help of her Fab G or Fabulous Godmother (Billy Porter), she is able to persevere and make her dreams come true. I dreaded this movie the moment I saw the first trailer on Twitter and it didn't get any better when the latest trailer debuted weeks later but I swore that I would watch it mainly for Porter & Menzel, who do turn in enjoyable performances here but as for the rest of the movie, it's a total clusterfuck. A complete and totally disappointing clusterfuck that lives to make you cringe with its blatant cheesiness, forced use of existing pop songs (beware, it'll try to make you hate "Rhythm Nation" as it plays over and over again) and equally forced messages of feminism that slaps you hard in the face as it tells you that life is more important having a prince and when you do get a prince, you don't have to put a label on it. Then, we have the performance of its leading lady, Camila Cabello. She has the charm but the acting is very, very, very spotty and like Addison Rae in He's All That, if she decides to continue with the acting, she's going to need to fine-tune those skills. This new edition of Cinderella is a cracked glass slipper of a movie that doesn't have the benefit of an extra pair to make it better. With the original animated Disney version, its live-action remake, the classic made-for-TV movie starring Brandy & Whitney Houston, the first movie in Warner Bros' ongoing Cinderella Story franchise and Drew Barrymore's fan favorite version Ever After already in existence, you'll be fine avoiding this one. Kay Cannon, you have gravely disappointed me.

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