Hellraiser ★★

What a way to de-elevate elevated horror. So wildly unsexy! If ur gonna hedge ur bets at least double-down on the horniness! Such a muted n muddy take, weirdly sanitised, wiping off the grime that gives this world texture. Get rid of like 75% of the monotonous hackneyed human stuff n add in 100% more cenobites (the maths tracks), u’d have a semi-cool movie. Alas, this movie has about 75% human stuff and 15% cenobites (at a push), and so it is not cool. Sad!

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