Jack & Diane

Jack & Diane ★½

Jack & Diane is a lesbian love story with monster-horror elements briefly interspersed throughout as some type of metaphor for the sexual awakening of Juno Temple’s Diane. Sounds interesting, right? Unfortunately, the end result is anything but.
I can appreciate the lofty ambitions of Bradley Rust Gray, attempting to tie-in the concept of emotional and physical turbulence with Lovecraftian imagery, but it ends up a failed experiment. If anything, it’s under-utilised, leaving you to wonder why it’s even included at all. This feeling is reiterated by several other components of the film... Diane’s twin sister, a tattooed Kylie Minogue, a non-consensual sex-tape... these little threads go nowhere and add up to diddley-squat. 
This frustration is not helped by the central blossoming love story being an exercise in tedium. There is little of substance here, and although Riley Keough is great as Jack, the romance between the titular couple is lethargic and unconvincing.
With no investment in the relationship, and the admittedly ambitious attempts at delivering some thematic substance failing to hit the mark, it all just feels like a waste of time. There is nothing in this hour and fifty minutes that couldn’t have been achieved in a 10 minute short film.