Cinderella ½

2021 Ranked

“Love?!  It was one night!”

I’d honestly rather watch that James Corden Twitter video on repeat for two hours than have to sit through this again… 

Well, I thought Space Jam 2 would be the worst film I’d see this year, and then this came. I’d heard nothing but bad about it, but I’m my curiosity got the better of me. It’s message of ‘girl power’ is absolutely beaten to the ground, making it feel like it’s set feminism back by about 20 years. Not one member of the cast feels like they want to be their. With some absolutely awful shoehorned and out of place musical numbers. 

My main draw was that it featured some of my favourite comedians. A film featuring James Acaster, Romesh Ranganathan, Doc Brown, and Rob Beckett can’t be that bad right? These are all funny guys! How wrong was I? Sorry Rob, but you’re not an actor, at all. Acaster and Ranganathan fair slightly better but thanks to an awful script and the fact that Corden looms his ugly head around all their scenes meant I couldn’t even enjoy them here. Even Doc Brown’s raps are awful, his Taskmaster rap about a fucking kids fish nursery rhyme was better than this! 

It’s all so lazily written and performed. It looks cheap and feels cheap. Like they spent all their budget on getting big names and had to go cheap for everything else. There’s just something so empty snd hollow about it all. I’d say it feels like a Disney Channel original, but that would be an insult to a masterpiece like High School Musical.

Maybe one day we will all be giving this 5/5 and laughing at it, like The Room but I doubt it. It’s not even got that camp charm, it’s just shit.

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