I like films. I like writing. I like writing about films.
Will watch any old shit.
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Next Goal Wins 2023
If you don’t like the films of Taika Waititi, then don’t bother seeing Next Goal Wins, because it will annoy you. However, if you have enjoyed his films, then there’s much to enjoy in this (partially) true story of American Samoa, the worst team in international football (once thumped 31-0 by Australia). If you want the true story, then check out the superb documentary of the same name from 2015. If you want that story told through the filter of…
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Christmas Carol: The Movie 2001
Picture the scene; primary school, week before the Christmas holidays. Maybe it’s a non-uniform day or a Christmas jumper day. The teacher wheels out the TV and VCR trolley. This is the kind of film they would stick on. Inoffensive but unexciting adaptation of Dicken’s Christmas classic, with some cheap looking animation and Nicolas Cage voicing Jacob Marley, and Kate Winslet singing an absolute banger over the end credits. There are much better versions of A Christmas Carol out there, though there’s probably much worse too.
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Jingle All the Way 1996
Arnold Schwarzanegger's bad parenting made Jake Lloyd grow up to be Darth Vader
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Workers Leaving the Lumière Factory 1895
The first film ever made and exhibited to a paying audience, the historical importance of The Lumiere Brother's Employees Leaving the Lumiere Factory cannot be overstated. If we didn't have this film, then we wouldn't have Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen! Actually, fuck the Lumiere Brothers! No I don't mean that. Thank you boys.
