Favorite films

  • Speed Racer
  • The City of Lost Children
  • Solaris
  • Mishima: A Life in Four Chapters

Recent activity

  • The Green Knight


  • Pulp Fiction


  • Godzilla Singular Point


  • Onward


Pinned reviews

  • Zack Snyder's Justice League

    Zack Snyder's Justice League


    My 1,000th review! Celebration after review.

    This movie has problems. Many of the fans who fought for its existence have problems. I was honestly dreading its release and I was extremely skeptical that it would improve upon the horrible theatrical release. How could it? How do you build on a foundation of crap? Well, it turns out the foundation was more solid than I thought.

    I am still mixed on Man of Steel and BvS.


    Oh my gosh what…

  • Star Wars: Episode II - Attack of the Clones

    Star Wars: Episode II - Attack of the Clones

    There’s this part in the absurdly long Geonosis coliseum sequence where Padme jumps from a tall pillar onto this big hard-skinned rhino creature, and it seems like her vag would be completely obliterated by the impact. She’s not a freakin’ Jedi! She can’t just fall crotch-first from that kind of height right onto this thing’s spine! She’s gonna have bruising for sure.

Recent reviews

  • The Green Knight

    The Green Knight


    Wow, that sure did fill me with dread and made me worry about the purpose of my life! Great job

  • Pulp Fiction

    Pulp Fiction


    One time I got horrible food poisoning after eating the “Royale with Cheese” at the Alamo Drafthouse. On the toilet all day and all night, puked on the plane, had to take hella imodium to make it through a wedding without crapping my pants.

Popular reviews