• Station Eleven

    Station Eleven


    Jeevan, Miranda and Frank ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

    This is a story about memories and how they’ll haunt you whether you try to bury them or not. It is also about found family.

    This is one of the most beautiful stories about the apocalypse and the pandemic. It is told in such a thoughtful, provocative manner. I don’t know the source material and I think it still is a fine adaptation.

    I miss Chicago and theatre made from pure passion. This is mostly…

  • Scream



    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    First of all I saw this in a legit real drive in. My first time. I have been to makeshift ones in the pandemic. It was a fun experience and I was free to give my thoughts on moments that would have been cooler without being rude to the other patrons.

    Good for Jack Quaid getting a sizable roll. I’m still obsessed with his face. Him and Lucy DeVito. Conan should do a bit about if those two mated.


  • Nightmare Alley

    Nightmare Alley


    This is a strange prequel to Stepbrothers.

    I thought of at least three more interesting twists than the one we got. 2.5 hours of this? It was pretty to look at and there are a bunch of stellar actors so it isn’t without merit but who cares? Bradley Cooper should stick with character acting. He’s a very uninteresting straight man.

  • The King's Man

    The King's Man


    Man, giving Matthew Goode some camp instead of just looking handsome is pretty ballsy. Give him something to do in Paddington 3 so we can forget about this dullsville prequel.

  • Batman



    In my memory of the many times I watched this, there was more Prince. I may have mistaken it for the soundtrack which is the best part.

    Still my favorite Batman.

  • John Wick

    John Wick


    I stand by my original review

  • John Wick: Chapter 2

    John Wick: Chapter 2


    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    Such a tease with Stomare in the beginning and we never see him again. 

    So many more dogs and none of them die. A+++

    This was my entry point into the John Wick world. It is still a lot of fun. Relatively little makes sense but who cares? 

    I always get excited whenever Peter Serafinowicz or Laurence Fishburne show up in stuff. Getting them both? 😍🥰

  • Maid



    I hate Andie MacDowell and despite her, this is quite good. Emotional villains are deceptive af.

  • The Tragedy of Macbeth

    The Tragedy of Macbeth


    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    There is a moment when Denzel leans against a pillar and I thought “he’s so beautiful”. I only realized when Kyle snickered that I said it out loud. 

    What they did with the witches was gorgeous. The cinematography was splendid. I loved how contained it felt yet so lavish in minimal style. It felt like a play as it should. 

    I am here for a knife fight between Dr. Dre and Malcolm X.

  • The Eyes of Tammy Faye

    The Eyes of Tammy Faye


    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    I mostly kept thinking “what is the point?” Which is how I feel about most features based on documentaries.

    This movie wears kid gloves but also the most ornate lucia libre costume imaginable.

    For awhile I was convinced Tammy Faye was fucking Noah Wyle when her water broke.

  • 2 Days in the Valley

    2 Days in the Valley


    Couldn’t finish this bullshit. I can’t believe the maker of Two of a Kind made something terrible…

  • Landscapers



    The framing of this story…swoon.