(The movie that definitively proves how policemen, regardless of how dissatisfied they are with their food-order, should NEVER send it back to the kitchen - especially when they ordered the "Number 2.")

In Kinky Coaches and the Pom Pom Pussycats, also known as the briefer but less fun to say Heartbreak High, John Vernon and Robert Forster play rival high school football coaches vying for this season's championship trophy. The competitive spirit spills out amongst the student bodies and the result is pranks, teenage rebellion and moral turpitude. Essentially, it's trying to be Animal House, only set in high school and on a budget.

The archetypes for your typical frat-slobs movie are in place. You've got the drooling animalistic cretin "Pigger", the simpering nerd "Weasel", and the completely undefined by anything other than his skin-color African American "Doolie".

All your old favorite tropes are in place: Teacher-fraternization, food fights, moonings, mascot-mayhem and strip poker. There's not much to define this movie technically. The camera work is routine and the veteran actors are clearly already thinking about their next jobs. Other than the aforementioned Animal House, most of the movies of this ilk are just abysmal. That said, Kinky Coaches and the Pom Pom Pussycats is for better or worse, about what one expects from this kind of thing.

On the sliding-scale of teen romps, this one, for me anyway, falls somewhere between being better than Fraternity Vacation but worse than Porky's.