You know...

This film definitely had its moments...

Short Round was a fun character and a certified badass for what he did in the film...

But my GOD...

WILLIE FRICKING SCOTT IS THE MOST INFURIATING CHARACTER OF ANY FRICKING FILM I’VE EVER SEEN. HOLY MACKERELS DID THIS WOMAN GET ON MY NERVES FAST. HER WHINGY WHINY VOICE IS LIKE LISTENING TO NAILS ON A CHALKBOARD.

ACTUALLY...NO...MAYBE EVEN WORSE THAN THAT! YEAH. I SAID IT. DEAL WITH IT.

I DON’T THINK I’VE EVER SCREAMED AT A FILM IN DISAPPOINTMENT AND ANGER THIS MUCH IN MY LIFE OF WATCHING FILMS. YOU CAN TRY AND TELL ME TO LOOK PAST HER ALL YOU INDY FANS WANT BUT HOLY HELL HER VOICE WAS HEARD IN MOST OF THE FILM’S RUNNING TIME. WHENEVER I WATCH A FILM, ANGER IS THE LAST EMOTION I WANT TO FEEL AND THIS SUBPAR (for Indiana Jones standards in my opinion) SEQUEL DEFINITELY MADE MY ANGER LEVELS INCREASE TO HEIGHTS THAT . LOOK HERE, WOMAN, YOU WANT SOMEWHERE GOOD TO MOAN LIKE THAT??? GET OUT OF MY INDIANA JONES MOVIE THEN. ALSO WTF WAS WITH THAT “ALWAYS GOES” DANCE AT THE BEGINNING??? WHAT WAS IT DOING IN MY MOVIE ABOUT AN AMAZING ADVENTURER?????

EVERY TIME THIS FEMALE’S LIFE WAS PUT IN DANGER, I CLAPPED LIKE A WILD APE. THE FACT THAT I WAS CHEERING FOR THE VILLAIN AT TIMES SHOULD PROBABLY BE ENOUGH TO TELL YOU WHAT I THOUGHT OF THIS MEDIOCRE MOVIE.

ALSO MISTER INDY, WHY DID YOU GIVE WILLIE A KISS AT ALL IN THIS FILM?!! SHE WAS ACTING LIKE A PRIVILEGED BITCH FOR A SIGNIFICANT PORTION OF THE FILM AND YOU GIVE HER LOVE IN RESPONSE???!!!! WHAT THE FRICK, DUDE?!!! AND WHAT WAS THAT “STUDYING  NOCTURNAL ACTIVITIES” CRAP ALL ABOUT?!!! YOU WEREN’T REALLY GOING TO DO THE NAUGHTY WITH THAT WASTE OF SKIN, WERE YOU, INDY?!!!! I LEGIT RIPPED MY GLASSES OFF MY FACE AND VICIOUSLY RUBBED MY EYES WHEN I GOT TO THAT SCENE BECAUSE I COULDN’T BELIEVE THE CHARACTER DEGRADATION THAT MY SORE EYES WERE WITNESSING!!

WHAT DID THAT FILM-CREW DO TO YOU, MAN...I THOUGHT YOU WERE BETTER THAN THIS, MISTER INDY :’(

*rant mode is shutting down...*

Raiders was miles better than this, without a fricking doubt...

At least Steven Spielberg found his wife out of making this film I guess...hope Kate Crapshaw isn’t this anger-inducing in real life

Last Crusade, you’re next on my watchlist...and you better not be a disastrous disappointment or else I’ll cry myself to sleep