Favorite films

  • Amélie
  • Parasite
  • Clueless
  • Spirited Away

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  • Blood Tide

    ★★½

  • Frostbitten

    ★★

  • Terror-Creatures from the Grave

    ★½

  • The Slaughter of the Vampires

    ★★½

Recent reviews

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  • Blood Tide

    Blood Tide

    ★★½

    “He played Othello once in college and never quite got over it.”

    James Earl Jones is a spelunker in search of an Ancient Greek mystery. He drinks like a sailor and quotes Shakespeare almost religiously. He also says, “There aren’t any goddamn sharks in these waters,” which in my mind seems like a precursor to Samuel L. Jackson’s “I have had it with these motherfuckin snakes on this motherfuckin plane!”

    Anyways. James Earl Jones is the only one here with…

  • Frostbitten

    Frostbitten

    ★★

    “I confess! It was me. Put me away. I’m a danger to society! I need a good talking to… and heavy medication! You’d better handcuff me.”

    I hate that the goth girl is an irresponsible druggie who gets all her friends turned into vampires… but she is clearly the only one in this movie with any good style. 

    The tone shifts in this Swedish vampire film are wild. From Nazi soldiers to high school parties to evil talking dogs and…

Popular reviews

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  • Fear Street: 1666

    Fear Street: 1666

    Fear Street: There’s Finally Adults But They’re All Just Acting in a Community Theatre Version of The Crucible 

    Are we just going to ignore that this colorblind casting/weird fusion timeline led to what looks very much like a lynching? Are they really just going to gloss over that?!! But whatever, I guess I’m not supposed to read into social issues because this movie is just a “pastiche.” 

    Ok so if I’m not allowed to comment on the irresponsible and clear…

  • Fear Street: 1994

    Fear Street: 1994

    ★★

    Fear Street: Where Are All the Adults?!!

    aka the woke film with lots of technology anachronisms and, how are there so many openly gay people? I went to a liberal hippie school where no one was even out until 2009. I mean, good for them, but wow what is this fantasy 1994; wish my dialup service was good enough to play computer games back then, and wish I would’ve felt as comfortable as these main characters about being out back…